Ever since the new abortion law was passed in New York State several days ago, I’ve debated whether to comment or not. But after reading several posts from various friends on both sides of this “war” I feel I would be out of integrity if I didn’t share from my heart how I feel and why… I am definitely a PRO LIFER.
This conversation was sent to a friend who is married to an adoptee – I’ve changed the names for privacy.
Your very own beautiful, talented, amazing, unique wife was given the gift of life in spite of being conceived in less than perfect circumstances for her birth mother. For whatever reasons, Jennifer’s birth mother chose to be “pro life” rather than terminate her pregnancy… and that decision allowed a miracle to take place: She got to experience being a very alive and full of pizzazz human! Have you considered how different your world would be without Jennifer in it? I’m guessing you would move mountains and go to any length to save her now that you know and love her, yes?
For me, being pro life is a deep knowing, honoring, respecting that EACH of us is a unique beautiful miracle packed with a one of a kind personality and gifts that have never been put together before in history and will never again be repeated.
Like Jennifer, I also came to earth riding a blazing shooting star at a VERY inconvenient time. I was conceived when my cash strapped, college student parents already had a toddler and a very sick hospitalized infant who had two major surgeries in his first few months of life…I wasn’t planned, wasn’t expected, certainly wasn’t hoped for or dreamed of, yet my mom chose to be pro life. She chose to believe that I was a blessing disguised as an overwhelming catastrophe at the “wrong” time. It just so happens I was born in upstate New York. I have been wondering if the dates were different if she would now be advised by her doctors to abort me due to her feelings of overwhelm and exhaustion taking care of her other child’s special medical needs etc…
Personally I am full of extreme gratitude to be here – to be alive – to have experienced the blessing of unexpected and unplanned motherhood myself – the pain, the bliss, the agony, the deepest love that can’t be described in words. I don’t believe we have been given the power/authority to take life away from someone any more than we have the power/authority to keep someone breathing when their time has come to leave this earth. It doesn’t matter how much we want another day with someone we love, it is out of our control. Yes?
I feel that in the cycle of this beautiful experience we call life, whether it is before birth or after birth, we must understand at a cellular and soul level that as women, while we are CO-creators / vessels / channels we do not get to choose the termination of another human being’s life without suffering profound consequences. I have been the friend who did my best to console friends who chose abortion. I have seen the consequences of that choice play out over decades…it has brought gaping wounds, scars of regret and led to feelings of guilt, loss, shame, unworthiness, settling for “less” in so many categories. Each mother has an intuitive feeling about their baby – often knowing whether it was a boy or a girl, and always knowing how old they would be now…if only they had chosen life.
I often wonder who those MILLIONS of beautiful people came here to be who were aborted and never got to share their unique amazing one of a kind personalities with us…. Perhaps one of them was sent to bring the cure for cancer? Perhaps one of them had musical talents that would have elevated all of us to new heights. Perhaps one of them was a funky artist who was sent to bring a very different splash of color that we will never get to see, appreciate and enjoy. I read recently that in the USA alone, if we had just one minute of silence for each aborted child, we would be silent for over ten years…
Suicide is an incredibly painful choice that some humans make, leaving those of us who loved them reeling from the shock, the grief, the disbelief that they didn’t know how much they were valued and loved and what a difference their life made to us…what a miracle they were in OUR story.
To make that “choice” for a human baby who was entrusted to you for their safety and nurturing and development and delivery here on Planet Earth…before they ever even have the chance to breathe, walk, talk, cry, laugh, make a snow angel, dance, hear music, pop a pimple, watch a sunrise or sunset, learn about dogs and cats and elephants and whales, fall in love, experience heartache, fully taste and savor the ecstasy of this MIRACLE of life…?
Wow. I couldn’t take that away from another person.
So I hope that helps you understand what “Pro Life” means for me. I’m glad YOU were born. I’m glad Jennifer was born. I’m VERY glad I was born. And I hope that we can get back to a place in our lifetimes where we remember how sacred and beautiful and short and precious ALL LIFE here on earth is, and that more of us empowered, enlightened, strong, capable women will support each other as some of us are blessed to be chosen for delivering the next generation of paradigm shifters to Planet Earth. May we welcome ALL the babies, even if we don’t feel capable of raising them. May we step up and accept the honor and duties of raising the unexpected children like Jennifer’s adoptive mother did.
I believe we are capable of so much more than we currently realize. I hope to shine a bright light on what else is possible….
Miracles exist in that space between what we think we can handle (perceived reality) after doing all that we know to do…and what is divinely orchestrated and simply incomprehensible in the vast realm of the mystery of LIFE.
When we value and appreciate life, we get to surrender and be the vessel. We choose to deliver LIFE rather than death. We become willing to ask if perhaps we are not in charge of choosing to end another person’s life just as we are not in charge of extending it, no matter how much we want to…
You posted that you feel most pro-lifers are pro-discrimination. In my opinion, the ultimate act of discrimination is choosing who to abort. There is no such thing as a “convenient” baby – and no date on any calendar that is the “perfect time” with absolute guarantees of everything unfolding just as you dreamed it would. Life is messy, unpredictable, and comes neatly packed full of unexpected adventures if you choose to say YES and focus on what’s great about it – that’s what being PRO LIFE means to me.